Chasing Post

Last time I just couldn’t get the format to behave with my script. This one is a little better but still the speech fights with everything!



BILL LETTERMAN, bearded man of 38 with a large plaster over his nose LEAPS out from bed. He looks sickly but has an essence of child like excitement about him. The house is cluttered with cardboard boxes, all with addresses labeled on them. Bill THROWS on a T-shirt and jeans and peeks through the blinds outside.

He sees a street blanketed in snow and little else. The neighbourhood is quiet. A car DRIVES past and Bill pushes his head through the blinds in excitement. He then looks disappointed. On the wall a calendar sits with the date January 23rd circled in red pen.

Bill walks down the stairs and sits by the door. He watches the letter box with great concentration. Above the letter box a clock is sellotaped to the door. The clock has a picture of a smiling postman near a red letter box holding up a letter which says BETWEEN 9 AND 10. The clock says 8.59.

Bill rocks as he sits on the stairs at 9.00

Bill eats a bunch of jam sandwiches. Drops of jam SPLASH against the wooden floor and as he finishes he kicks the jar of jam on the floor over which CLATTERS and a flood of jam pours out.

Bill dances round the room and selectively looks outside the window as NOISES are heard.

9.58 on the clock. Bill bites his lips,he strokes his beard quickly and the POSTMAN appears behind the door and pushes the doorbell. A LOUD JINGLE from the doorbell is heard. Bill scrambles for the door but slips on some jam from his sandwich. He SLAMS against the floor and he falls unconscious. Jam is smeared across the floor like blood.

The clock shows 10.30.

Bill wakes and slowly sits up. His vision is blurry as he looks around but he sees something red is peeking out from the letter box. He crawls forward and pulls the red slip. The red slip reads : SORRY WE MISSED YOU AT 10.00AM. PLEASE COLLECT YOUR PACKAGE AFTER 24 HOURS.

Bill’s begins to cry as he grips the postage slip.


This can’t be happening. I’ve never missed the postman and all because of some fucking strawberries!

Bill looks to the window. A blizzard rages outside. He touches the plaster on his nose and GRUNTS in pain.


There’s still time… I can get that parcel before the postman leaves the street! I can’t miss this one no matter what!

Bill pulls the door open and rushes outside.


The blizzard is thick and obscures the surrounding area. Through the raging storm Bill walks in his t-shirt and jeans and shields his eyes as he walks. The surface is completely flat and the surrounding area is white with no visible locations.

As Bill trudges through the blizzard, red blood fills his plaster on his nose and his skin goes pale. He sees a figure through the buffet of snow. A POSTMAN jogs.


Wait Mr. Postman! You have my parcel!

No response comes from the Postman. Bill tries to run at a quicker pace but soon runs out of breath. The Postman is getting fainter.


Not yet… I can’t give up yet.This is more important than the others.

He reaches out to the postman and stumbles with a CRASH into a lamp post. He stays still and the snow piles up on his body. His teeth chatter and then his eyes close.


Bill opens his eyes and looks around. He is in a post office waiting in line on his own. A man is behind the glass with a sign saying NEXT CUSTOMER above.The man behind the glass wears a suit made out of envelopes with no apparent face. POST taps on the glass to get Bill’s attention.


Where am I? Who are you?


I am the post you keep ordering who now lives in the recesses of your mind. You are dying Bill and all for one parcel. Didn’t you think to at least dress warm?


I’ve never been one to think.


No just one to click! Here look at this!

Post pulls a postal tube from his pocket and taps it against the TV next to the glass.. Another Bill appears standing inĀ  the hall wearing a plaster on his nose. He stands alone and seems to be waiting by the door. He starts to sit in front of the stairs and remains still, waiting.


I remember this…


Yes this is when you wait by the door everyday and you don’t know why. You just wait and wait but why?


I was waiting for something to happen. Yet nothing ever did. So I started ordering post.


And you never really cared, what where you waiting for really?

The image changes and the other Bill vanishes. Next is another Bill sat by the computer. On the computer a WOMAN wearing a white lab coat waves at him. Her lips move but no sound comes out.


My mother, she hadn’t contacted me in so long and said she’d make me better. I always hoped she’d come back. This is that parcel, I can’t wait till tomorrow, I’ve been waiting so long! Take me back!

Bill smashes the glass and grabs Post by the sleeve and rips the envelope body into pieces. The office starts to crumble away, the SOUND OF RUSTLING PAPER fills the room and everything goes white.


The other post… it was all practise for receiving this.


Bill opens his eyes and he is face down in the white snow. He lifts himself up and sees a puddle of blood which has come from his nose. The plaster has peeled off to reveal a bloody stump of a nose.



He leans against the lamp post and BREATHES heavily, his breath visible in the cold.

POSTMAN follows a path in the blizzard. He is dressed in a winter jacket and shorts. Little drops of blood are seen on the floor. As he follows the trail he stumbles upon Bill who is sat by the lamp post.


Hey are you OK?


P-postman… you have my package.




My post…

Bill grabs Postman’s bag and shakes it. Letters and parcels fall along with the snow.


What are you doing? Stop that!

Bill pours through all the post as he looks frantically for his package. Blood drips onto the letters along with the snow causing a confused flurry of colours. The envelopes scatter in the wind and the postman attempts to grab them. Bill clings onto one parcel.


For me with love from Mother…

Bill starts to rip open the package but the postman runs to kick him. Bill rolls in the deep snow and drops the package.


You can’t open post without I.D!

Bill SPLUTTERS and tries to get up but the Postman keeps him down with his foot.


I can show you I.D if we go back to my house.

Postman eases up and Bill stands up. He stares at Postman and sways a little then HEADBUTTS Postman in the face.


There’s my I.D!

Bill looks for his parcel and finds it covered in blood. He RIPS it open and pulls out a small object. The Postman is lying on the floor and turns his head to see what Bill has been fighting so hard for.

A PLASTIC NOSE was the object in the package. Bill thumbs it around in his hand before he sticks it to his bloody stump. He smiles and a tear rolls down his eye.


Thank you mother.

He looks at Postman.


How do you get by in those shorts of yours in this cold?


I’m a postman so I endure. But look at you in your Tshirt and jeans.


You’re right, it’s cold. I wish I wrapped up warmer but my mother never warned me about these things.

Bill’s T-shirt ripples in the wind and the snow begins to let up. Sun shines brightly and breaks the fog. A friendly neighbourhood street is revealed and Bill falls to the floor. The nose remains stuck to his face. The Postman runs to Bill’s body and shakes him.

A letter falls out of the package Bill opened.


Dear Bill,

I hope you are well. I nose you needed this so hopefully you will go outside now. Lets not run and have fun. I sent this as I know you love getting post so much.
P.S. Dress warm.


At the front entrance the clock RINGS and the image of the postman reaches the red box.


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